Saturday, March 29, 2008


Driving home from the store, I was listening to NPR. I think the show was American Weekend or Weekend America. Some of the stories on NPR can bore me beyond understanding. People tell these stories that they find so quirky but they just come off sounding pretentious. I hope I don't sound like an NPR story. Unless its a good one. But I won't hold my breath. One that they told today I could relate to. This guy was talking about how he saved all his papers (letters, essays, notes) since he was little. Birthday cards, angry letters from ex-gfs, high school newspaper articles he wrote. I guess I am the same way and I don't know if this was handed down to me or if this is just the way I am. My dad has saved most of the homework and art projects we did since we were little. There are bins of the stuff that crowd the messy basement. Packing for the PC has made me turn my room inside out, even more so than usual and I've come across all these old notebooks from high school, art I've done over the years, love letters, pictures of when my brother, sister and I were small, small gifts from past loves, cd compilations made by friends...basically just a hoard of things that bring back too many memories. It's not necessarily a negative thing but it's just a bunch of stuff that is from such a long time ago. Sometimes you wonder, how did I get from there to here? How did I overcome this? At times you think that you haven't changed at all in the past years but it's not true. Sometimes you just aren't able to verbalize how you've changed. Or you cling to certain moments in your life because you felt really happy and free then. Aaah, nostalgia.Yet, then you realize once again that everything happens for some reason. One you won't know until later. God will eventually kneel down, hold his hand up to your ear, and whisper it. But when?

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